You eva just get up inna di mawning and leff you yaad fi guh rerk and have a gnawing sense that almshouse is afoot? 😟
Well this morning........true to form I was out of my good good bed from 4 o'clock fi try reach the plantation early when I became awash with this unsettling feeling. Like a true creature of habit I did a mental check of all my ( b4 mi leff mi yaad) must do things and turn back two time .... and thru dat the early bus leff mi 😒 .... walking out to the bus stop mi see the " in case the early bus miss you" coaster fly pass mi spot 😢
..... A wah coulda cause dis? 😧
Ok but mi still neva late soooooooo mi a wait pon mi in case of emergency ( doh mek dis miss you coaster) bus when mi see a small bus .... rare but hey......
The driver may as well have been Miss Daisy how him drive frigging slow ..... Cho Badwod Badwod Badwod Claaat 😡😡😡😡😡..... breathe chile ...... you're only going to Golden Circle Plantation .... No need to rush .....
Ok so now the morning get interesting ..... Who dat a circle Downtown like freshly certified hawks but two police jeep .... cho man it too early fi this shit ....... See a taxi .... dash een deh wid mi ova size bag .... taxi drive off ... instantly the bredda beside mi snuggle up pon mi shoulda and promptly fall a sleep ...... Really Nigga its like 5:40 ..... A WHO WOK YOU OUT LASS NITE ?....... Ease up nigga cause a neh mi. Oman pon the odda side a have a interesting convo wid har fren ....... have mercy .... Nuh wah kno har bizniz ennuh all of a sudden rain start drizzle mi hear she gi out .....
A wah di bloodclaaat dis ? A rain dat ... and mi nahave no ambrella ?
Mi start pop up wid laff ..... hear her nuh .... in a big dirty ghetto voice .....
" Lady .... a wah yah laff fah?" 😑
before mi could even respond she call fi a stop ...
Driva let me off a embassy!!!!
Anyways any well-to-do Jamaican dat haffi pass US Embassy know that its a bustling commercial ecosystem ..... Of which .... unbeknownst to me and my fellow travellers Ghetto
goodie was a part of.
Ghetto Goodie open the car door and a nether goodie hawk dung pon di car fi engage what she presumed to be a Visa Seeker only to be greeted with a big loud ...... " BITCH MOVE AND GWEH" 😮😮😮😮😮.... Inna mi mind mi a seh dem Goodie yah ramp ruff sah .
Mi seh in a split second Taxi Goodie get one lick inna har face and she in turn grab the odda goodie and throweth her dung pon the taxi man soft soft Tiida bonnet ..... 😲😲😲😲😲
To how we frighten hear the driva unnuh a see dis? 😕😕😕😕😕😕
then promptly reverse suh dem nuh drop pon the car bonnet again
😀😀😀😀😀😀😀No sah ....... Things a get warm out chere
Now mi have several questions?
1. A wah really a gwaan outta embassy ? 😵😵😵😵😵
2. A wah dem goodie deh a nyam a dem yaad suh early fi find strength fi a frigging fight?
3. Will the Tiida require Intensive Care affa dat deh Rass drop pon di bonnet ?
and finally A wah really coulda cause all a dis?
